I know all about your standards.
And if you don’t mind my saying so
There’s not a man alive
That could hope to measure up to that
Blend of Paul Bunyon, St. Pat, and Noah Webster
You’ve concocted for yourself
Out of your Irish imagination, Iowa stubbornness,
And your library full of books.~Meredith Wilson’s The Music Man
Here’s the problem with fictional men: someone made them up. And as a result, we have to seriously look for their faults. And while characters like Dom surely have faults, because we see so little of those faults on the page, it’s hard to imagine them at all.
As an author, my characters have far more faults than I’d probably ever admit to on a page. I will never trust Remus Lamark (for reasons you will understand when I finally publish that book). For that matter, I love and hate Wren McKay in turns – possibly because I allowed her to take a path I never will, but gave her some seriously lacking boundaries in doing so – making me really hate her inability to know when things have gone to far. I’ve made Evie a truly lovable character, but her curiosity is as much a curse as it is a blessing.
But Sergeant Domitan of Masbolle is not my character (he belongs to Tamora Pierce), and therefore I have a much harder time attributing flaws to him. In fact, I have found myself, on a regular basis, comparing real life boyfriends and crushes to this one fictional character.
Now, I’m sure that Sergeant Domitan of Masbolle is not the only fictional character I’ve had a crush on. There have been many over the years, without a doubt. However, he is certainly one that has been recurring. And I know fully well why – especially now.
He is one of the few male fictional characters that takes the female characters around him seriously. He never questions their judgement any more than he would their male counterparts. He never assumes that they can’t do something. He treats everyone he meets as equals. Now, it is mentioned that Dom is a huge flirt. However, that’s never something he allows to influence the professional field.
In addition, his camaraderie with Kel makes it clear that (should anything ever happen between them – a fact that is clearly left up in the air) their friendship will always come first. And that is a side of relationships that I feel like has been lost in the modern day method of internet dating. I half believe that the real reason marriage is beginning to fall by the wayside is that when you’re introduced with the expectation of a relationship, there is very little friendship foundation to be built, which increases the likelihood of a complete topple. Especially in a world where divorce has become normalized, if you can just leave a marriage at the drop of a hat, what’s to stop you from getting married just for the heck of it?
So yes, I’m jealous of Kel and Dom’s friendship because you know from their conversations and the way they act around each other that they have the beginnings of a really good foundation. They trust each other. And that much is so important.
It also doesn’t help that Kel is probably one of Tamora Pierce’s characters that I feel closest to. (Daine from The Immortals and Tris from Circle of Magic probably come the closest after Kel.)
So perhaps it’s all in my head, but I have this gut-wrenching fear that I’d have to find a real life Dom for me to get my happily ever after – and I just cannot afford to hold out for a knight in shining armor. But I’m also not going to settle for just the next man to come along, either.
My white knight…
Not a Lancelot, nor an angel with wings
Just someone to love me,
Who is not ashamed of a few nice things.My white knight…
Let me walk with him while the others ride by.
Walk and love him,
Til I die. Til I die.~Meredith Wilson’s The Music Man